Blogging in....

Here she is....

2007-03-13T15:10:00.000+08:00

Announcing the birth of
JEWEL MICHELLE LOPEZ - GANA

Born on February 21, 2007 at 3:07 pm 5.4 lbs. at Jose Delgado Memorial Hospital.

Excited to see what she looks like? Then visit my blogsite regularly.

Maternity Photos

2007-01-22T13:42:00.000+08:00

A week ago, I had a chance to work with 2 photographers who specializes on maternity portraits. It was my 32nd week of pregnancy and I'm just so proud of my bulging tummy. And now, looking at my photos, I was really really happy with the outcome. It was picture perfect!

These shots were taken by Carla Berroya - Foster, and I'm really glad I met her. For those interested to have their maternity photos also you may contact Carla at 0916-4060689.

Janelle's 3rd Birthday Party

2007-01-19T11:00:00.000+08:00

We celebrated Janelle's 3rd birthday party last December 17 at Jollibee SM City North Annex. It was Janelle's idea to hold her party at Jollibee. The color motiff was also her idea and even the Red Ribbon cake was her choice.

She helped me actually plan her party including the guest list. Grabe sobrang OC din ang anak ko at 2 months before the event pinag-uusapan na namin ito especially bago matulog.

She's no longer a baby....

2006-10-13T10:27:00.000+08:00

Time really flies...dalaga na ata ang baby ko. Isnt' she lovely?

One Stormy Day at Montemar Beach Resort

2006-08-14T11:40:00.000+08:00

July 29 -30, 2006 - Sobrang trip ito with my HS Barkada. Mag-beach ba naman sa kasagsagan ng Bagyong "Inday"!

Anyway sarap magbakasyon at magtulog. Sobrang peaceful!

Little MJ is back!

2006-08-14T11:18:00.000+08:00

Little MJ is back! Story to follow ....

Celebrating 16 years of Friendship in Hongkong

2006-07-13T16:27:00.000+08:00

I was out of the country last July 6-10. I was with my College friends in Hongkong. I hate to admit, but it's my first time in a foreign land. It's tiring but it's fun.

Thanks to my Friend E who shouldered first all the expenses including air fares. Now back in reality, we have to save now so we can pay her our debts.

And to my friends, 'tho we have different personalities, different likes and dislikes, still we are ready to embrace each others differences. Thanks for the friendship.

My new IPOD Nano

2006-07-13T16:16:00.000+08:00

Been saving on this IPOD Nano for months now. Finally I was able to afford one. I bought my Nano in Hongkong last Sunday, and it's a bargain. I bought it at 900 HK $, that's around P6,300. Here in the Philippines it's still around 9,000 ++.

It's an advance birthday gift for my husband this coming August. He'll be using it more anyway.

Thank You!

2006-06-07T16:08:00.000+08:00

We wish to express our appreciation

for your gift of love and the kindness shown

during our bereavement

With warm Regards

THE LOPEZ FAMILY

Paalam Tatay!

2006-06-07T16:01:00.000+08:00

For my Tatay :

+FERNANDO R. LOPEZ
(May 25, 1943 - May 29, 2006)

Happy Father's Day
by Tami Blackwell

Give 'em a hug, a great big kiss.
Because one day, he will be greatly missed.

My daddy has gone far away from this land,
I miss the precious touch of his loving hands.
I never knew last year was the last day, I could look at my daddy, hug him,
and say: "I love you, Daddy! Happy Father's Day!"

Don't let one day go by without telling himhow dear he is!
Remember you may not have another year to tell him this!
All I have now is great memories, a heartfull of love and eyes full of tears,
and to remember his love throughout the years.
Now I will have to look up at the stars
and say, "I love you, Daddy! Happy Father's Day!"

Please remember when you pray,
to thank your heavenly father up above.
For your father he gave you with so much love.

"He lived, for Jesus died;
He died, for Jesus Lives."

Digital Scrapbooking 101

2006-05-11T11:58:00.000+08:00

Been busy lately with Digital Scrapbooking. I only started last week and have been addicted to it. I was inspired by some friends and I am hooked to it right now. Here are my first 4 lay-outs.

I enjoyed downloading freebies from the internet such as embellishements, wordart and other Photoshop Elements. Looking forward for more masterpieces.

So what's up?

2006-05-03T11:15:00.000+08:00

It's been almost a month since I posted my last blog. I really missed blogging. So what's up with JLo?

Puerto Galera Escapades - April 8-9, 2006

It's Puerto Galera this time for our Company's Annual Team Building. We stayed at Kalaw Place and of course the entire day at the White Beach.

R's 1st Birthday Party - April 29, 2006

We attended R's 1st bday party. The theme of the party is SEA Games. Janelle was so happy with the toys she got. Sabi nga nya " Wow! Mommy plenty toys!"

Enchanted Kingdom - April 30, 2006

First time ni Janelle sa EK, first time din ni Daddy and Mommy. Kaya sobrang happy ang family!

Mommy Tag!

2006-04-04T11:42:00.001+08:00

How did you feel during those first few days after the birth?

***Exhausted and in pain because of my CS cut.

How were you emotionally?

*** VERY emotional. There were times na I'll cry nalang without any reason why.

How long do you plan to breastfeed?

*** I'm a failure at this. I was not able to breastfeed my baby not even once.

Do you have any advice for getting through those first weeks of breastfeeding?

***nope. I'm not the right person to answer this.

Was there any stress between you and your husband over the baby?

***When I was still under depression, I felt like I'm the only one working for the baby, parang sobrang nakakapagod dahil sa puyat, diaper change, feeding etc...

Did things get totally rearranged?

***Yes! Things were different after I gave birth

What advice-or comfort-can you offer other new moms about their weight?

***I don't think I had a problem with weight. I gained not more than 20 lbs on my entire pregnancy. And I felt good about my body, I feel sexy!

How important is it for you to have a work identity?

***Hayyy!!!! I'm still in a dilema right now

Was your baby a lot of fun right from the start?

***YES...sobrang nakakatuwa.

What's your baby like now?

***Now that she's 2 years old, I already found signs of intelligence and talents on my daughter. She can sing and dance and she's adorable.

Inside my Kikay Kit

2006-03-15T14:13:00.000+08:00

I dont usually wear make-up, although there had been some attempts in the past years, but my "ningas cogon" attitude hinders me from wearing make-up everyday.

Since I don't have enough knowledge about make-up, I thought that all products were the same. I used to buy cheaper products without even considering my skin color. I really dont care if the product will smear nor smudge, or will that product complement me or not. I don't make a fuzz if my face looks oily even with make-up, as long as I was able to tell myself " Hey look! I'm wearing make-up!"

Not until I attended a seminar/workshop on Corporate Image Enhacement. It made me realize that, I should wear at least basic make-up. From then on, I started buying and carefully study what will I benefit from it.

And here's what inside my blue kikay kit :

1. Lancome's Flash Retouche Concealer #03 - I found the right color for me after a make-up trial at Rustan's.

2. Max Factor's Long Lasting Performance #301 Ivory - Finally found a pressed powder that doesnt make my face dark. I found out that wrong powder / foundation which is not compatible on the acidity of your skin makes your face looks dark after a few minutes. I still would like to try other brands such as Lancome's 2-in-1 but it's a bit pricey but I'm still not closing doors.

3. Lancome's Hypnose Waterproof Mascara - It doesn't smear because it's waterproof. I found its waterproof features' perfect for me because I sweat easily.

4. Maybelline's Moisture Extreme Lipstick (Brown Sugar) - It doesnt make my lips choppy because it has 3x moisture compared to other lipstick.

5. Lancome's Juicy Tube - It taste good!

6. Neutrogena Lip Moisturizer (spf 15) - I rarely use it since I already have my Moisture Extreme, but just in case....

7. Kanebo's Kate Color Shadow - I like its applicator, easy to use.

8. Oil Clear Absorbent Paper - My emergency kit since I have oily skin on my T-zone.

9. Victoria's Secret Love Spell - I'm not really into perfume or cologne just like any other women, but I found the right one for me.

One Fine Day...

2006-03-10T13:47:00.000+08:00

Natutuwa lang ako sa conversation ng mag-ama ko:

Janelle : Ganda amit daddy oh...

Mark : (wearing a Superman shirt) Nasa nagdadala lang yan baby...

Janelle : Di kaya!

Happy 1st Birthday TOYANG!

2006-02-22T16:57:00.000+08:00

It's been a year since we bought our "TOYANG" and we're almost finish paying in full... yipeee! Happy Birthday to you , TOYANG!

Far Away North!

2006-01-23T13:09:00.000+08:00

Last January 17 - 19, I visited these places and whoooooaahhhhh sobrang sarap talagang mag-travel! I really had fun!!!

1. Fort Ilocandia - It's my first time at Fort Ilocandia and sobrang ganda ng place. The archithecture is a mixture of Filipino, Spanish and Chineese, no wonder why there were a lot of Korean / Chineese Nationals who were visiting the place. If you will ask me if I will come back again? Definitely Yes!!!

2. Vigan - It's my second visit at Vigan, pero this time mas madami akong nagawa and these includes : (1) a taste of the Famous Vigan Empenada (2) visited Baluarte of Chavit Singsong (3) Kalesa Ride while enjoying the Heritage Village (4) visited the Bell Tower and a lot lot more .

3. Pagudpod - Second timer ako sa Pagudpod, I visited the place June of 2005 and like the first visit, I never had the chance na makapag-swimming, as in talagan visit lang. Hopefully sa next visit ko swimming na talaga.

All Dressed Up for the Holidays

2006-01-06T16:12:00.000+08:00

December has been a very busy month for me. From choir practices, performances and competitions to shopping of gifts and preparation of my daughter's 2nd birthday party, sobrang na-harassed talaga ang beauty ko.

But inspite of the stress and tensions, I enjoyed dressing up for the Holidays. During our Company's Christmas and Anniversary Party at PICC, I had the chance to have my hair and make - up done at Bambi Fuentes Salon in Visayas Ave. Natuwa talaga ako sa result na ginawa nilang transformation sa beauty ko.

Feeling ko si Carmina Villaruel ako! Oh I just love it!

A Girl Bonding Experience

2006-01-06T14:59:00.000+08:00

JLo, Elma, Rowie, Arlene, Net, Leriz

Last December 29-30, I had a chance to reunite and catch up with my College Girlfriends.

We had fun reminiscing our College Days. We talked about our lives now as wives and mommies.

Looking forward to another Get together this July in Hongkong.

Tag!

2005-11-18T13:07:00.000+08:00

Tag! I was tagged by April (who was tagged by Jody, who was tagged by someone else :).

At first I dont know what is April is talking about on my tagboard, so I decided to check also Jody's TAG!... so here it goes....

20 THINGS ABOUT ME

1. I don't eat chicken.
2. I'm married for 4 years (Nov. 24, lapit na!)
3. I love Constantine of the American Idol.
4. I love to sing and dance.
5. I'm a government employee.
6. I can be hyperactive at times.
7. I enjoy going to Divisoria and shop 'till I drop!
8. I love party planning.
9. I don't know how to cook.
10. I don't see my daughter and husband everyday / I'm a weekend wife and mom!
11. I attended Grade1 at the age of 5 and graduated from College at the age of 19.
12. I started teaching HS Computer Education at the age of 19.
13. I started to work as a Promo Girl at the age of 17.
14. I took fertility pill.
15. I have inverted nipples.
16. I don't know how to swim.
17. I have a typing speed of 55wpm.
18. I have urticaria (skin asthma)
19. I have a Bobby Andrew's looking husband (hehehe)
20. I love blogging too!

I'm tagging Ana, Mich, Tina

Lapit na ng Birthday ni Janelle...

2005-10-20T11:41:00.000+08:00

Noticed my Lilypie banner? Lapit ng mag 2 years old ng unica hija ko. Shes growing up so fast and Im so proud of her. Last night, I was surprised because she noticed the Letter "O" and the letter "S" print on my T-shirt. She said "Mommy! O" while pointing at my T-shirt and then pointing to another "O". After a few second, "Mommy! S". It was surprising kasi hindi pa naman namin sya tinuturuan ng letters kasi baka di pa niya kayanin, pero with the skills that she is showing now, mukang tuturuan ko na sya.

So ano na bang pinagkaka-abalahan ni Janelle ngayon, now that shes 22 months ?

1. Dora forever! She knows all the characters of Dora the Explorer including Boots, Benny, Isa, Tico, Senior Tucan, Troll, Swiper, Map, Backpack, Papi, Mami and Diego, etc.

2. Can count from 1 to 10 in English and Spanish.

3. Can dance the Jollibee dance while singing "Aayo Ayo! (Dito tayo dito tayo na pautal)

4. Can dance Pinoy Big Brother while singing "Inoy...Mundo...Mo....Takot....Mo!"

5. Can tell/point the following shapes and colors: Triangle, Square, Circle (triangle as her fave), and red as her fave color.

6. Can pray to Papa Jesus "Amen"

7. Can immitate KC Concepcion Shampoo Commercial "....Ever"

8. At marami pang mga kalokohan.

A must read for parents...

2005-10-04T16:31:00.000+08:00

I cried after reading this forwarded text message...

While dad was polishing his new car, his 4 year old son pick up a stone and scratch lines on the side of the car and his fits of anger dad took the child's hand and hit 8 times, didn't realize that he hit the child's hand with a wrench...

At the hospital his child said "Dad when will my fingers grow back?". Dad was so hurt, he went back to the car and kick the car a lot of times...sitting back, he look at the scratches the child made.... It read "I Love You Daddy!"

Pinoy Big Brother at ang Himig ng Pag-IBIG Choir

2005-09-27T14:05:00.000+08:00

Katulad din ng maraming Pinoy na gising pa ng alas diyes ng gabi, isa ako sa mga tagasubaybay ng Pinoy Big Brother. Madalas natutuwa ako sa mga karakter na nakatira sa bahay ni Kuya, madalas ding naiinis ako kahit wala naman silang ginagawang masama sa akin. Pero sabi nga nila "reflection" daw ito ng pagkatao mo.

Hindi ko tuloy maiwasang maipagkumpara ang mga karakter ng mga "housemates" sa mga taong kakilala at nakakasama ko araw-araw. Hindi ko maiwasang ipagkumpara ang mga "housemates" sa aking mga "choirmates".

Ako ay kabilang sa Himig ng Pag-IBIG Choir at mula ng mabuo ang groupo noong 1999 nakita ko ang paglago nito. Ibat’ ibang mukha, iba’t ibang karakter at iba’t ibang personalidad.

Sa aming grupo, mayroon kaming mangilan-ngilang "RAQUEL" na ang nais lang ay mapaganda ang aming "performace" pero bossy ang dating sa iba. Marami din kaming pasaway na katulad ni "UMA". May ilang katulad ni "RICO" na laging tulala, marahil ay iniisip din ang kanyang ex-gf. May mga katulad ni "FRANZEN" na masyadong mahiyain at kulang ng "self-confidence" pero mayroon din naman palang ibubuga. May mga hyper at pasikat na tulad ni "NENE", may mga malalambing at maalaga na katulad ni "CASS" at "JENNY". May mga mapoporma at lapitin ng "chicks" katulad ni "JB" , heartthrob na katulad ni "SAM" at matinding magmahal katulad ni "SAY". Marami sa aming "JAYSON" na patawa at masarap kasama. May ilang ding "searching" na katulad ni "CHYX" at katulad ni "BOB" na mahilig mag-analisa ng sitwasyon.

Ibat’ ibang mukha, iba’t ibang karakter at iba’t ibang personalidad. Pero yan naman ang nagpapasarap sa isang samahan.

Masasaya at Malulungkot na Posts

2005-09-07T16:14:00.000+08:00

Nung nagsisimula palang akong mag-blog, sabi ko sa sarili ko puro magagandang postings lang ilalagay ko. Masasayang kwento tungkol sa akin, sa anak ko at kung ano ano pang magagandang bagay na gustong sabihin ng utak ko. Pero minsan di talaga natin pwedeng pigilan na may mga pagkakataong malungkot ang isang tao.

Nasa hospital ang Tatay ko ngayon. Nahihirapang huminga, sabi ng doctor Emphyzema na papuntang TB na daw, kaya mga isang linggong mahigit daw siya sa hospital. Okey nadin kesa sa cancer.

Sana ang susunod kong mga posts masasaya ulit. ..

Skin breakouts...

2005-09-05T14:27:00.000+08:00

Noticed my new skin? For the past 2 weeks, I've been experiencing 2 types of Skin Breakouts...

Type A (My Blogskin) - I've been attempting to change my skin, it's my first time and I've encountered so many trials... Sounds dramatic, but it is! Last week, after attempting to paste some HTML codes from blogskins.com, and after over a hundred trial and error, I deleted my previous template settings. I was in a state of shock when I found out I lost my links, site meter and tagboard and I felt really really sad.

I woke up this morning with these problems in mind, so equipped with determination and patience to cope up with over a hundred trial and error, I found the perfect skin for me....

Type B (My Acne, blackheads, whiteheads) - After I had my hair rebonded last month, I've been experiencing skin breakouts on my T-Zone. Again I felt so so sad! How I wish I could just cut somebody's skin and paste it on my skin so I can have the perfect skin... huhu!!!

Janelle's Vocabulary 101

2005-08-31T15:38:00.000+08:00

At 20 months, marami rami nading nasasabi ang "taratitat" kong anak! But here are some that needs more practice.

Janelle - nane
Bayad - baya
Barney - arni
Baby Bop - babap
Butterfly - baflay
Fishy - ishi
Pajama - ama
Tummy - ami
Tito - tsitso
Nanay - nana
Tatay - tata
Ian - iya
Feet - fi
Ganda - gada
Dora - gora
Backpack - bapa
Totoy Bibo - ibo
Birdy - erdi
Egg - ge

Time really flies and mukang nagdadalaga na din ang aking unica hija at ang hilig humarap sa salamin...

Confessions...

2005-08-30T14:18:00.000+08:00

Everytime my officemates talks about their kids and how nourishing a mother's milk can do for babies, I can't help but feel guilty. I was not able to breastfeed Janelle, not even once. When I was still pregnant, I have read much about the benefits of breastfeeding and I even wanted to join this group of moms that promotes breastfeeding. But I just can't...

I have a confession to make... I don't have nipples... some called it inverted nipples, but it's more than that, it's not only inverted but...Oh no, I just can't describe it!. I am producing enough milk when I gave brith but since I dont have nipples, there's no way for my daughter to enjoy the benefits of my colostrum. It was too stressful for me, sometimes I felt like I'm inadequate for being a mother. They say that breastfeeding is a wonderful experience, and I'm jealous! I wanted to feel the same experience with my daughter, but I just can't...

And I just can't...

Photography 101

2005-08-24T11:07:00.000+08:00

My interest in photography started during my wedding preparation back in 2001. Since then, I started organizing my photos and starting to shoot whoever, whatever and whenever I feel like doing so. My relationship with my Canon Digital IXUS i started almost 2 years now and as the days passes by, our bond becomes stronger and stronger. I don’t know anything about photography, I don’t even have a technical know-how and most of the times I have problems with lighting and framing.

These are what I called my lucky shots, point and shoot and being in the right place at the right time are all what it takes. They are not award winning but I would like to share with you my Magnum Opus!

Check it out at http://community.webshots.com/user/bonsky_jen

My PCOS Diary

2005-08-04T15:03:00.000+08:00

I would like to share what I've been through when I was still trying to conceive. Here's my PCOS Diary.

December 2, 2002 - Its my 1^st day of cycle after being delayed for 19 days. Finally! When I visited Dra. Macapagal 2 weeks ago I told her about the possibility of not ovulating. With no blood work or any tests, she prescribed me Duphaston and Clomid right away and was advised to have TVS on cd12.

December 12, 2002 - I went to Healthway this afternoon just to inquire about their price for TVS. Ellen advised me to seek for a second opinion and recommend Dra. Nelinda Pangilinan. She’s also affiliated with St. Lukes and accepts Medicard. So it’s fine with me. During the consultation she asked me the reason why I had my miscarriage last March. I really don’t know, all I know is that my Little MJ has fetal bradycardia. Dra. Pangilinan advised me to have a TVS on cd5, OGTT 75mg, FSH + Estrogen on cd2 to check if I have hormonal inbalance which she suspects right away after telling her I have irregular period. She also asked for my histophatology record and to stop taking Clomid.

January 3, 2003 - Its cd1! My period is not late and I have a 30 day cycle already. Maybe its because of the Dupasthon which I took last December. I did not respond to Clomid.

January 7, 2003 - Its cd5 and I had my TVS with Dra Pangilinan this afternoon. Inside the TVS room, I was praying that no tumor be seen inside my uterus or anywhere. I was in a state of shock when she told me that the reason why I am not ovulating and why I have irregular period is because of polycysts. From the word cysts, I cant help but asked her how to treat it. Do I need to undergo operation? Confidently she answered me that there are medicines for this syndrome. She prescribed me Duphaston and was asked to have my OGTT test so she can give the right dosage of Metformin.

She’s very accomodating and she explained me well. But that doesn’t stop me from my depression.

January 11, 2003 - Finally I found time to have my OGTT test. No food or water for 12 hours and I was taken blood samples 4 times with 1 hour interval. The test was very stressful.

January 14, 2003 - Dra. Pangilinan saw the result of my OGTT and told me that I am insulin resistant. Hour 1 is above the normal. She advised me to start taking Metformin 500 mg 3x a day for 3 months. She also advised me to return to her on my cd1 to cd3 on March to check if we can stimulate ovulation.

January 18, 2003 - I have nausea and I vomitted because of Metformin. I also started taking Duphaston for 10 days.

February 3, 2003 - Its cd1. Again it’s a regular period. Maybe I am responding now to Duphaston and Metformin because there are no more sharp pains, no heavy yellow discharge, and no more cramps, and the best of all no more hunger fangs.

February 4, 2003 - Its cd2. I took FSH and Estrogen. Hoping that the results are normal so I can start taking Clomid by March and be able to conceive very soon….

February 10, 2003 - Got the result of my FSH at 8.7 . Based from what I read, I think its normal because the normal value for follicular is 3-12 mlu/mL. No result yet for my estrogen. I was asked to get it tomorrow before my consultation.

February 11, 2003 - My Estradiol is below normal (13.55). That is the reason why the follicles does not reach maturity. Still wait for the 15^th day to check if I’m ovulating or not.

February 26, 2003 - I’ve watched Etc on infertility. It focused more on Artificial Insemination and IVF instead of medicines and other PCOS condition. Should I consider that as an option?

April 3, 2003 - It’s the 3^rd month of my fertility treatment and I had my first CD. I reported right away to Dra Pangilinan because she advised me to visit her on my first CD. She prescribed me Clomiphene Citrate (Clomid) 100 mg to be taken daily in 5 days starting CD2. She also prescribed me folic acid to be taken daily for 14 days. I was scheduled on the 12^th for my TVS to monitor the growth of my follicles. She will give me back-up on the 15^th if in case there’s no big developments.

April 6, 2003 - Its my 4^th day of taking Clomid, and I felt a little dizzy and nauseated. I guess this is what Dra. Pangilinan is telling me once I started taking the Clomid / Metformin combination.

April 12, 2003 - Its my 10^th cd and its my TVS schedule for follicle monitoring. My Polycysts has been transformed into a follicle and I have already 1 dominant follicle which is ready to pop anytime. My uterine lining is so thin at .1 and Dra prescribed me progynova for 3x a day for 3 days. She told me to have my TVS again on April 15.

April 15, 2003 - Had my TVS at Laguna to monitor my follicles, 3 dominant follicles found and will pop anytime. Was advised to have sex of April 16 and 18…Will I have triplets?

May 3, 2003 - My period is late. I have cramps and sharp pains on my breast. I might be pregnant already.

May 5, 2003 - Took the pregnancy test twice and its both POSITIVE. Finally, the long wait is over………

More Lessons...

2005-08-04T14:28:00.000+08:00

After 6 hours of surfing the net and reading through bloggers knowledge page, I was able to customized my blogpage. Whew! I downloaded Mozilla Firefox for me to be able to use the Blogger Image feature and viola!!!! I did not stop until I was able to add more links, guestbook and counter stats.

Well, that's me! If I started on something and was hooked on it, I will not stop until I get what I want. I remember when I was still TTC (Trying to Conceive), I did not stop praying, visiting my OB-Gyne/Fertility Expert/Endocronoligist religiously, taking medications and exams such as FSH, OGTT, OGCT, Follicle Monitoring etc..., luckily I was able to conceive in less than 6 months.

So what's the moral of the story? Determination, Perseverance and Discipline + Luck = a blogsite with photos, guestbook and counter stats...hahaha!

HTML! Oh My!

2005-08-03T13:56:00.001+08:00

It's my second attempt to blog and I'm beginning to enjoy the complexity of HTML. I was really inspired by reading some of my friends blogs and here I am now, customizing settings and scrolling through my template and do some magic with cut and paste. Yes, I admit, I am a newbie!

I dont know what's with blogging, but I'm beginning to feel its addicting effect running down my veins. I started talking to myself, smiling and laughing in front of my PC, started texting friends on the 'how's' of it, shouting "YES!" whenever I have a succesful cut and paste and most of the time thinking on what will be my next entry.

I still remember the feeling when i had my first post. It's not that easy, I spent 5 hours composing my first entry and it's very emotional for me. Well, I still have so many things to learn and do. I still have to insert pictures, have to add more links and to get to know more HTML and the heck of it. Oh My!!!

Pagbabalik Tanaw

2005-05-24T14:06:00.000+08:00

Ang bilis ng panahoon, parang kailan lamang ay punong puno ng lumbay ang aking puso sa kadahilanang hindi ako mabiyayaan ng isa man lang supling. Ngayon, naririto ako ng punong puno ng pasasalamat sa Panginoon sa kanyang binigay na biyayang hindi kailanman matutumbas ng kahit na ano pa man, isang napakandang anghel na ang pangalan ay “Janelle” na ang ibig sabihin ay “Ang Diyos ay mapagbigay!”

Sa tuwing nagkakaroon ako ng pagkakataon na makasalamuha ang ilang kapitbahay na may kasalatan sa buhay, nababalot ako ng ibat’ ibang klase ng emosyon. Nalulungkot ako para sa kanila sa kanilang sinapit, ngunit ako ay natutuwa sapagkat hindi naranasan at mararanasan ng aking anak at ng magiging mga anak ang buhay na tulad sa kanila.

Sa bawat bagong gamit, damit, masasarap ng pagkain at ilan pang mga bagay na ibinubuhos ko sa aking anak ay ganon din ang luhang pumapatak sa luha ng kanilang mga anak sa tuwing makikita nilang nilalaro nito ang kanyang mga bagong laruan. “Nay, bili din tayo non…….”, mga katagang madalas kong marinig na may kasamang sama ng loob sa sinapit ng kanilang buhay.

Sa mga mata ng mga batang ito, nakikita ko aking buhay nung aking kabataan, madalas din akong makaranas ng kasamaan ng loob dahil sa kahirapan ng buhay. May mga pagkakataong umiyak dahil sa kagustuhang magkaron ng magagarang damit ngunit hindi man lang nagkaroon ng sandaling pagkakataon na maisuot iyon. Naaalala ko pa ang bawat listahan ng utang namin kay Mang Lucio, nakakahiya mang mangutang ng tuyo at gatas na malapot para sa hapunan namin ay wala akong magawa dahil ako ang panganay. Mangilan-ngilang beses din akong nag-ulam ng mantika at asin, ilang tasang kape na din ang aking nainom na mula sa binusang bigas at ilang beses din akong nagsuot ng nakangiting sapatos na pilit pinapatikom ng ‘rugby’. Tulad din ng mga batang aming kapit-bahay ngayon madalas din akong makaranas ng pagkainggit sa mga batang may kaya sa buhay.

Sa panahong ngayon na ako ay nakakaranas ng kaunting kaginhawan sa buhay, nais kong kahit sa kaunting paraan ay makatulong sa mga batang katulad ko din noon…, mga batang salat sa pagkain, laruan at mga bagay na nakakapagpasaya sa musmos nilang isipan. At sa tuwing makikita ko ang aking anak, lalong napapaalala sa aking isipan na magbigay…,dahil ang pangalan niya ay “Janelle” na ang ibig sabihin ay “Ang Diyos ay mapagbigay…”